Jan 16

Happy family

Happy Family

Happy family everyone expects but it,s happen now a days less then 40%. ‘Family’ is a single word, with many different meanings. People have many ways of defining a family and what being a part of a family means to them. Families differ in terms of economic, cultural, social, and many other facets. Every family has in common is that the people who call it.  A family are making clear that those people are important in some way to the person calling them his family.

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Many people consider friends to be as close or even closer than extended (or immediate) family. People who have lost close family members may create a family unit of friends. Similar interests and goals to become replacements or enhancements to a lacking family structure. This type of family unit, while nontraditional, can be just as close, if not closer, than a traditional structure. Friends are chosen by an individual; at times, these people. May be more special or important than the family a person was born with addition.  Some people who have supportive families also have an extensive network of friends. They consider to be a second family or as additions to their blood or legal relatives. Pets can also become members of a family unit. Pets add an element of responsibility to a family, particularly for children. LG V30

Enjoy each other

The essence of a happy family that is truly uplift each other and that all comes down to how they treat each other.  Says Shmuley. A New York-based family and relationship counselor and host of The Learning Channel’s Shalom in the Home. “There is a joy that characterizes their interaction,” says Boteach, father of eight children and author of several books, including the forthcoming Shalom in the Home. “Parents come home and the kids are happy to see them and when kids come home, the parents are happy to see them. LG V30

“When your kids come home, ask them what happened in school and have a story for them,” he says. “If you come home dejected and not really interested and then five minutes later the TV is on, why would they be happy to see you?”

The bottom line, he says, is that when you come home, your kids have to come first. “You must drop everything you are doing and always come home with something to share with your kids, whether a story or even the smallest vignette,” he says. “This way you give your kids something to look forward to. The great bane of family life is boredom and that is what leads to dysfunction, affairs, and kids wanting to be with their friends over family.” productsforest

“Set a real example of love,” Boteach says. “The relationship and marriage must come first.” Think Carol and Mike Brady of the Brady Bunch and Cliff and Clair Huxtable of the Cosby Show.

There are many families where kids always come first, says Boteach. Then they become substitute providers of love, he says. “That’s an unfair burden to put on a kid.” It’s also bad for families, he says, “because kids will move out of the house eventually.” productsforest

“In happy families, family comes before friends,” he says, “The camp counselor understands something that parents don’t and that is that caring for kids also has to be fun. Give rules, but understand that kids need fun, too. When kids get bored and listless, they start looking for excitement out of the home and that is when friends become more important. Friendship is important, but subordinate to family.” productsforest

Limit Children’s After-School Activities

Today, growing numbers of kids are overscheduled and participate in six or seven after-school activities per week. The mother becomes a chauffer and the children are never home at the same time. This is not a recipe for a happy family, Boteach says. “If your kids grow up not knowing how to do ballet, they will be OK. No after-school activities is an extreme and too many activities is the other extreme, but moderation is where we should aim.” Create your own after-school activities as a family, he suggests. For example, take your kids rollerblading, bike riding, or swimming after school as a family. productsforest

 Build and Honor Rituals

Families need rituals,” Boteach says. Rituals can be religious, national, or even family-specific, he says.Barbara Fiese, PhD, professor and chair of psychology at Syracuse University in New York, agrees. “Happy families have meaningful rituals and are not stressed out by them,” she says. “They can be unique to your own family such as going for bagels on Saturday morning, a weekly pizza night, or even a family song. Rituals tend to bring family members close together because they are repeated over time. “To work, rituals need to be flexible, she adds. “They can’t be rigid,” Fiese says. “If the bagel place is closed, you have to go someplace else. productsforest

Keep Your Voices Down

Remember that children thrive on stability. “There has to be a calm environment at home,” says Boteach. “Talk to your kids, give them strict rules, and punish children when necessary, but don’t lose control and yell. If you yell at kids, that shows you are out of control and you create a nonpeaceful environment.” productsforest